What a strong man can afford

Two contractors in Jeddah build villas on the same kind of plot, for the same kind of client, and on the surface they look equally successful.

The first pays the tilers and electricians when he is chased, and sometimes not even then. He tells clients the clever detail on the staircase was his idea, though it was the carpenter's. When an inspector finds a fault, he argues until the inspector gives up. People around him call him tough, and they mean it as praise.

The second pays his suppliers before the invoice is due. He brings the carpenter to the handover and lets the client thank him in person. When a job goes wrong, he does the slow, expensive thing and fixes it properly instead of finding the shortcut that passes.

Both drive good cars. By the ordinary signals, both are doing well. That is the trap, because from the outside the two routes can look identical for years.

The difference appears under strain. The first man's way of working depends on everyone around him needing him more than he needs them. In his first bad year, when he needs credit, a favour, or a crew willing to work a weekend, he discovers what he has been spending all along. The second man has a reserve he never had to count. People turn up for him.

Underneath this sits an older lesson. Squeezing people, taking credit and settling every score are what someone does when he is afraid of looking weak. A person who is actually strong can be generous with what he is owed. He can waive a late payer's penalty, or let a rival's mistake pass without comment, because nothing about his position depends on winning that one.

Holding back is the luxury of real power. Grabbing is what the anxious do with power they are not sure they have.