Waiting for the first note

A cake arrives at a table in a Manama restaurant with a candle in it, and the table tries to sing.

Nobody wants to start. Ten people look at each other for a breath too long, then three begin at once in three different keys, two come in a word late, and someone at the far end is still on the first line when the rest have reached the name. The tables nearby wince. Everyone can hear it, including people who could not tell you a single thing about music.

We are very good at hearing when a group is not together. A tiny lag, one voice slightly sharp, and the whole sound turns from warm to awkward.

The odd thing is that the lag does not come from bad voices. It comes from politeness. Each person is waiting for someone else to lead, so they can follow just behind and be safe. When everyone does that, the song has no front. It begins in a smear and stays there.

The tables that sing well are not more musical. They have a few people who simply start when the plate lands, on the beat, without checking first. The others hear a clear opening and fall in with it.

Being in step does not come from following carefully. It comes from enough people going at the moment it is time to go, and trusting the rest to be there.

Most of us would rather come in half a beat behind. That half beat is the whole problem.